


The Purest Love

by MyJediLife



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben has PTSD, Dog trainer Rey, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Former Marine Ben, Happy Ending, Kylo is a dog, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, Mental Health Issues, Military Background, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rey Needs A Hug, Therapist Rey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-19 09:07:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22608487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife/pseuds/MyJediLife
Summary: When a deeply scarred and traumatized Ben Solo is placed in a program to try and pair him with a canine helper, he finds that he gets more than he ever imagined with the therapist assigned to him.
Relationships: Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 36
Kudos: 133
Collections: For one is both and both are one in love: The Reylo Fanfiction Anthology's Valentine's Day Exchange





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [six4au](https://archiveofourown.org/users/six4au/gifts).



> Your prompts were so very, very amazing that it was hard to pick! I had to choose this one because of my extreme love of dogs (I have 3!), and my love and respect for the military. I hope you enjoy this! <3

[ ](https://imgur.com/kTGSvph)

Ben Solo had always been a difficult child. His mother claimed it had started with his birth, when, after twenty-seven hours of labor, Benning Lucas Solo had made his entrance into the world - and promptly stopped breathing for ten seconds, causing his doctors to go into a full-fledged panic until he started screaming.

As a child, he had been hard to calm and subject to tantrums at the tiniest thing. His parents were run ragged trying to keep him happy and calm; the only thing that seemed to work at the time was letting him work beside his father in the garage, rebuilding engines and rewiring ignitions.

As a teenager, with hormones running rampant inside him, a pair of big ears he kept hidden behind a shock of long, shaggy hair, moles dotting his face, a long nose and a tall, lanky frame - Ben was sullen and angry. He stayed in his room, reading and practicing his calligraphy, and when he emerged for mealtimes and the occasional foray into public, he glared at everyone and remained silent until the anger inside him exploded - and some hapless piece of furniture or other inanimate object was the receiver of his fist or foot through it.

Leia was terrified, and his father, Han, was reassuring, telling his wife that their son would ‘grow out of it’, and that it was ‘nothing a good fuck wouldn’t take out of him.’ Leia, of course, had smacked her husband in the chest, letting him know that, under no uncertain terms, was he ever to tell their son that.

His Uncle Luke had been the first person to mention the military to him. At the age of fifteen, with no other options, Han and Leia had sent their only child to live with her twin brother, who had been in the military himself. Luke had been strict with Ben, teaching him how to vent his anger at punching bags and other training apparatus.

The day after he had graduated high school, Ben had gone to the recruiting office and signed up for the Marine Corps. The military gave him what nothing else ever had - a sense of belonging, being part of a team and knowing that your battle buddies always had your six. It had given him friendship - even though Ben was prickly and introverted, he had made friends. And though his nickname had been embarrassing -  _ Ears Two  _ \- it had stuck, and after a while, Ben would usually laugh it off before giving his buddy the middle finger salute. The Marines had given Ben a sense of belonging and purpose, as well, and he had found his temper was much easier to control.

Everything was mapped out for him. He had a plan for the future. He would stay in the Corps until retirement, then go into security or law enforcement as a civilian. He would go to college on the GI Bill, getting the education he needed while serving his country and benefitting from the rigid routine of being a soldier.

Ben thrived. He grew. He became the person he had always wanted to be, the person his parents became proud of...

Until his third tour. That’s when his world exploded - quite literally.

Only three members from his unit had survived - and Ben had been hailed a hero for pulling them out of the rubble of their Humvee. Ben was happy he had saved those men, and he would have done it all over again if given the chance. It was his job, and those were his brothers. Losing as many as he had left an indelible mark on his very soul.

He could still see their faces if he closed his eyes, could still see the blood and mangled limbs and burnt flesh. The doctors had told him he had a closed brain injury from the concussive force of the IED, and Ben had tried to forge ahead once they had deemed him unfit to return to duty, giving him an honorable discharge the day after his twenty-fifth birthday.

The life he had wanted, had dreamed about, seemed to be left behind in the arid, scorching desert of Iraq, and Ben had been adrift ever since. Alcohol helped numb the pain and kept the voices and faces of his dead brothers at bay.

He was now twenty-eight, living off a trust fund, and was an alcoholic nobody. He had nothing to help keep him grounded. The VA wanted to throw pills at him after doing MRI’s and x-ray’s, claiming that it would help with his crippling headaches and chronic pain - but Ben knew they were wrong.

Nothing, and no one, could help him.

_________________________________________________

Rey Kanata loved helping veterans, the wounded warriors who ensured the freedom for every citizen of her adopted country. After graduating college with a degree in Psychology, Rey had landed a job with the VA, and a year later, with the ink barely dry on her certificate, which stated she was a dog trainer, she had opened up “Helping Pawz”, a non-profit that helped train and place canines with wounded warriors who needed help - whether it was physically or mentally.

Rey glanced down at her notes as she got ready for her first client of the day - a former Marine who had heroically rescued two of his brothers from sure death after a roadside bomb destroyed their Humvee. The man could definitely benefit from a canine friend - he had PTSD, a closed head injury and had taken to self-medicating to deal with everything.

Rey had the perfect dog in mind for him. Kylo was a three-year-old German Shepard, with dark fur and a patient personality that Rey thought would work well when paired with her new client’s own personality. Of course, she might change her mind after meeting with him, but Rey had read his file through twice before deciding to try and help him - and her instincts were hardly ever wrong.

Rey walked into the waiting room, looking at the people who were seated there, waiting for their appointment time. “Ben Solo?” She called out softly, smiling as a tall man with a shock of unruly black hair unfolded himself from one of the chairs.

“Hi there!” Rey said next as the man came to a stop in front of her, a pair of expressive brown eyes looking down at her. “Let’s go back to my office, shall we?”

The man shrugged, his voice rolling like a low rumble of thunder on the prairie as he gestured to the door. “After you.”

________________________________________________

Ben hadn’t wanted to be part of some damn charity program. He had done what he did because it was his job. He had wanted to defend his country, and he had.

Everyone had scars to bear, after all, even if you lived a completely benign life. Sure, his scars may have been a bit deeper, and still bleeding, but he could handle them. He was handling them.

He was only here because his VA shrink told him he needed something besides alcohol and pills to cope. His parents had agreed with him, and so here he was, sitting in the waiting room of “Helping Pawz”. He had thought about having a drink - or three - before coming to this appointment, but his mother had shown up at seven in the morning to cook him breakfast and make sure he went to the appointment.

Ben knew why she had really shown up, though. She knew he would have stayed home otherwise. Ben sighed as he shifted in the small chair in the waiting room. The door in front opened, and a woman stepped out, her hazel eyes sweeping across the waiting room before she called out his name with a British lilt to her voice.

His name coming from her lips was like a song, and as Ben stood he could feel her eyes raking over him. He tried to ignore the small thrill he felt as she looked at him, knowing it would do him no good to develop any kind of feelings for this woman. He knew he was fucked in the head, he knew he was broken inside. He had known that since he was a kid. He would never want a woman to have to deal with all his baggage.

He gestured to the door, trying to ignore the way his heart rate increased a little simply by seeing her smile at him. “After you,” he said, waiting for her to step through the door ahead of him.

_____________________________________________

Her office was small and cozy, with warm colors and chairs that were more comfortable than the waiting rooms. Rey gestured for Ben to take a seat on one of them before settling into the chair behind her desk.

“So, Mr. Solo…” Rey began, opening the manila folder on her desk.

“Ben. Mr. Solo is my father,” Ben replied, huffing out a sigh as he looked down at his fingernails, feigning indifference while pretending to examine them closely. His heart was still pounding in his chest, and he could already feel his anxiety building, even though he was intrigued by this woman in a way he didn’t think he ever could be.

Women made him anxious.  _ People _ , in general, made him anxious.

“Okay, Ben… my name is Rey Kanata, and it’s my job to determine which canine would fit best with you, if at all. I understand you were in the Marine Corps?” Rey looked at him, and Ben just nodded, not looking up at her.

“Good. Now, it looks like you were referred to us by your Uncle, Luke. He was hoping you could benefit from a canine helper since you live alone. I know my dogs help me immensely every day…” She could tell Ben was anxious simply by looking at him, an anxiety which seemed to be growing every moment now.

Ben had stiffened in his seat at the mention of his Uncle. His head snapping up finally, and his eyes finding hers.

_ How dare she? How dare  _ he _? Once again, he thinks I’m crazy. He thinks I can’t handle anything. They are embarrassed by me - their drunk family. Nothing, I’m nothing to them, they wish I would have died in Iraq with the rest of them, then they wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore! _

He could feel his anger, his loneliness and sadness cresting inside him, a wave that was threatening to drown him as it stole his breath away before smashing him to the ground, broken and bleeding again. Then, something inside him snapped, and Ben stood, reaching out with a long arm to sweep everything off the desk in front of him with an anguished roar.

“NO! No! Luke… he thinks I am worthless. They all do! Poor Ben, worthless and broken. An embarrassment. Not worthy of their time… just pay his bills for him and let the alcohol numb him so he’ll stay calm. Here, Ben, have another pill! They don’t understand! YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!”

Ben was breathing heavily now, his nostrils flaring and his eyes full of fury as he turned to the door, slamming it open and stepping into the hallway. He stopped at the sight of the most beautiful dog he had ever seen being led towards him on a leash. Amber eyes regarded him curiously as the handler had him sit, and Ben just stared, his breathing evening out and his anger fading as he took a few steps towards the animal before crumpling to the ground in front of him, cooing at the dog as he offered him the back of his hand to inspect. The dog sniffed it before giving it a lick, and Ben’s eyes flicked up towards the handler’s, silently asking for permission to pet the dog.

The woman nodded, and Ben reached out with a shaking hand to pet the dog’s back, not noticing Rey stepping out of her office and approaching them from behind. Rey’s eyes met the dog’s handler’s as Ben whispered to the dog, petting it gently, and both women nodded after sharing an understanding look between them.

“Ben, this is Kylo. We were hoping you two would get along.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey draw closer as Ben heals more from old wounds.

[ ](https://imgur.com/XxrxAeY)

If Ben had known he was going to actually look forward to going to a counseling appointment, he probably would have tried it before this. Perhaps it was the prospect of spending time with Kylo, whom Ben had bonded with in the moment he looked into the canine’s soft brown eyes. It also helped that… well… he hadn’t been able to get Rey out of his head since they had met the previous week.

He knew it was unhealthy to think about her like he was. He shouldn’t get so attached. It was only going to end in heartache for him. Everything ended in heartache for him. It always had - it always would.

Ben took in a deep breath as he stepped into the building, his anxiety rising along with his excitement. Down the hall, and inside the fourth door on the right, was his new best friend, and someone Ben could have by his side for years to come - through everything. But there also rested a woman that Ben couldn’t get out of his head, with beautiful hazel eyes and a head full of soft-looking chestnut hair. Ben hadn’t tried to date since he came home - he figured he was too fucked up to even try. Who would want him? All he did was sit in his house and drink to stay calm.

But Rey… when she looked at him it was like she was seeing him as a normal man, instead of one who would crawl under his bed at a roll of thunder and lightning, or would have to sit on the floor rocking if someone slammed a door in the apartment above him. Maybe having Kylo in his life would help. Maybe it would make him feel better, like he could function again without having to shake like a leaf as soon as he stepped outside his apartment door. Maybe he wouldn’t have to drink a fifth of whiskey to stay calm enough to make a phone call or go and buy groceries. Maybe Rey could see him in a different light, maybe… maybe someday he could even muster up the courage to ask her out to dinner.

Ben stepped into the hall, stopping outside Rey’s office door. Reaching out with a shaking hand, he rapped his knuckles on the wood gently, waiting until he heard a quiet “Come in,” before he turned the handle to open the door. Stepping into the office, Ben let his eyes drift to Rey’s, who had a smile on her face.

“Hello, Ben. Please, sit down!” Rey gestured to the chair Ben had sat in on his first visit the previous week. “How have you been?” Rey asked, watching as the tall, handsome former Marine took a seat.

“I’m vertical and breathing,” Ben said, shrugging his shoulders. It had taken everything in him to get into his car to get here today for his appointment, although the prospect of seeing Rey and Kylo again made it a little bearable.

“Have you started going to meetings yet, Ben?” Rey’s eyes were concerned, and she leaned forward, her elbows on her desk as she cupped her chin in her palm.

Ben nodded in answer. He had gone to one the day after his last meeting with Rey. It was nerve-wracking, and he had a panic attack after he got home - the three new holes in his wall were proof of it.

“How did it go?” Rey asked, and watched as Ben sat back in his chair. She could tell he was anxious, and that his anxiety was rising by the second. “Hold on a moment, before you answer, Ben,” Rey said as a thought came to her mind. Picking up her phone, she texted her assistant, asking her to bring Kylo to them.

Ben waited as Rey did something with her phone, and then she looked back at him, giving him a smile that made his heart stutter in his chest. “Okay, now, how did it go?”

“It was… terrifying. I held it together, for the most part. I… I put a couple of holes in my wall when I got home though. I was feeling overwhelmed…” The door opened, and Ben’s words trailed off as Kylo entered the room, his tail wagging furiously as soon as he saw Ben. “Buddy!” Ben said, letting a genuine smile drift onto his face. Kylo seemed to sense his mood, moving across the room to nudge Ben’s hand with his snout, then sitting beside his chair and looking at him with his bright brown eyes. Ben felt all the tension fading from his body as he looked down at the German Shepard. He could feel the tears coming to his eyes as his gaze drifted back up to Rey’s as the dog lifted himself up onto his back feet, his big paws coming to rest on Ben’s shoulders as Kylo licked his cheeks gently, his tongue rough on his skin as he let out a laugh.

Rey watched the exchange, trying not to let tears come to her own eyes. It was always emotional watching a bond forming between a former service member and their new best friend and helper. This time, it seemed to be affecting her more than usual, although she couldn’t place exactly why.

Ben spent the rest of the counseling session with his hand on Kylo’s back, his fingers brushing through his soft fur. Rey found it fascinating to see the strong bond the two already had, and as she and Ben worked out a training and counseling schedule for the next three months, she would be lying if she said she wasn’t already looking forward to it.

As Ben made his way home, he thought about how calm he had felt in Rey and Kylo’s presence. He was certain it was probably the instant connection he had with the dog more than anything, but every time he thought about the beautiful chestnut-haired therapist - well, his heart would start racing, and he found himself fantasizing about what it would feel like to kiss her.

He shouldn’t, but he did. He was looking forward to spending the next three months being in her presence three times a week. Finally, he had something to look forward to.

….

Rey shouldn’t be thinking about a client the way she was thinking of Ben Solo. It had been a month now since she had placed him with Kylo, and she found herself looking forward to every Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoon - because that meant she would get to spend time with Ben.

There was something about him. Maybe it was the way he looked at her, every feeling inside him evident in those amber ringed molten chocolate eyes of his. Maybe it was his voice. His voice was the most sensual low, dulcet tone, and every time he said her name, Rey wanted to shiver in pleasure. What was even more intriguing to her was that Ben Solo was a genuinely good, kind man - a true hero in every sense of the word. He had put his life on the line to save those men in Iraq - and had paid the price for it.

_ No. You need to stop, Rey. You need to keep this professional. Set those feelings aside and help him. _

Still, Rey could feel the anticipation building all day as she waited for Ben’s appointment time. She tried not to think about how his hands looked brushing through his hair when he was nervous… which only led to her fantasizing about how his hair would feel in her fingers. Was it as soft as it looked? Would his lips feel as good on hers as she imagined? And his hands… how would they feel against her skin?

A knock on her office door pulled her out of her fantasies, and Rey tried to push the thoughts aside as she focused on helping her next client for the day.

….

Ben hoped he wasn’t about to come across as creepy. He had noticed one day how Rey had her assistant order her coffee form the shop the next block over, and so he had stopped there before his counseling session for the day, praying he wouldn’t have a breakdown if he had to wait in line to order.

_ So far, so good, _ Ben thought to himself as he entered the building housing Rey’s office. At the time of his appointment, Ben tapped on the door, his heart already threatening to beat out of his chest.

He knew it was wrong to feel the way he did about Rey. She was his therapist. She was the woman responsible for matching him with Kylo, who was one of the most important things in his life right now. But, at night, desperate to sleep, Ben imagined a life with both Kylo and Rey at his side. With Kylo’s help, Ben thought he would find a way to cope out in the real world again. He would try even harder if Rey ever deemed him worthy of her affections.

Her eyes, though, her eyes would be his undoing. Ben had never had anyone look at him quite like Rey did. It was like she saw through all the bullshit and looked into his soul. He felt  _ comfortable _ with her, and that was not something he was used to. People never made him feel comfortable. He felt like a burden to his family, he had no friends, and he always felt utterly alone. But… maybe Rey could make him feel less lonely.

Ben sighed, running a hand through his hair as he waited for her to allow him in her office.

_ You’re an idiot, Solo. No way would someone as perfect as her want someone as fucked up as you. _

“Come in,” Rey’s voice rang out, and Ben stepped into the room, smiling at her as he took the coffee cup out of the cardboard holder, setting it on the desk in front of her.

“I… I brought you a coffee. I hope that’s okay.” Ben settled into the chair he always sat in, giving Rey a smile as he took a sip from his cup after removing it from the holder.

“Thank you, Ben! I always have that whole end of the day sleepiness going on, so this is nice.” Rey smiled at Ben, blushing as she felt her heart start thudding double-time in her chest.

_ God, he’s beautiful…  _ Rey thought as she took a moment to look at Ben, from his plush lips, to the beauty marks dotting his face, down to his muscular arms, then further down to his thighs, the muscles there threatening to rip the seams of his jeans every time she saw him.

“You’re welcome,” Ben’s voice rumbled softly, and Rey felt the delightful throbbing between her thighs that always seemed to happen when Ben was around. Her body was a traitor in his presence, it seemed, and all Rey could do was try to ignore it as she took a long drink from her cup.

“I’m afraid Kylo won’t be joining us today, he’s at an appointment with the vet…” Rey began, her eyes growing wide as Ben stood suddenly, his eyes frantic with worry.

“Is he okay? What’s wrong with him?” Ben started pacing, his free hand fisting in his hair, and Rey noted that the hand holding the coffee cup was shaking. 

_ OhGodOhGodOhGod… if something is wrong with him… can’t do this. He’s my only friend. If something is wrong with him… why? Why me? _

Rey came around the desk quickly, looking up at Ben before saying, “He’s okay, Ben. Kylo is just getting his nails trimmed and some vaccinations.” Reaching out, Rey placed a hand on Ben’s arm, smiling at him. “I understand you being worried, and I should have worded that differently. I am sorry. Do you want to sit down and try some of those breathing exercises I recommended?”

Ben looked down at Rey, her hand on his arm creating a delicious tingle of energy that flowed through him, calming him enough so that he could  _ listen _ to her. Nodding, he sat down and took a sip of coffee from his cup, swallowing it before looking at her. “Thank you… I… I think I am okay now.”

Rey went around her desk once more, settling into her chair before giving Ben a smile. “That’s wonderful, that you calmed so easily. So, how has your week been? Are the meetings still helping?”

“Yes,” Ben replied, hoping he was keeping his emotions in check. His mother had always told him she could see everything he was feeling, and Ben didn’t want Rey to know just how utterly besotted he was with her. “Also, the VA shrink finally changed my meds now that I am seeing you and going to meetings. He refused to give me anything unless I was done drinking. I admit… they seem to help. The headaches… they are still there, and nothing helps the nightmares.” Ben shrugged, feeling hopeful as he watched Rey’s eyes lighten as she looked at him and smiled.

“I am so happy, Ben. You are definitely on the right path, and you’ve made tremendous growth this past month. The bond you and Kylo have is incredible, and I just know the two of you are going to do well together. That reminds me…”

Just then, a loud bang sounded from the hallway, followed by a loud voice yelling, “You can toss off, you bloody wanker! I don’t need your fucking advice. I know how to fucking handle myself!” Another loud crack sounded, and Ben threw himself off the chair, crawling underneath the desk, somehow shoving himself into the tiny space and wrapping his arms around his knees. He started to rock, his breaths coming in heavy spurts as he shook his head from side to side, trying to push the images out of his head somehow.

_ It was hot, so hot inside the Humvee that Ben could feel the sweat trickling down his face as the armored column moved along the sandy roads outside of Fallujah. It happened so fast that Ben didn’t have time to react until his world was a blur of blood, smoke and flames. He acted on instinct, quickly assessing his own injuries before staying low and looking for any of his battle buddies. Blood, there was so much blood, and flames were getting closer and closer, the acrid smoke threatening to choke the life from him… _

“Ben? Ben… listen to me…” Rey recognized that Ben was in a panicked state, and so she had pushed her chair back, and was on her knees beside him, hoping she could help him through the attack. Licking her lips as she watched his eyes fade, knowing his head had him in another time and place, Rey reached out and gently placed her hand on his arm. “Ben… it’s me, Rey… come back to me, Ben. Wherever you are, come back to me…” After a moment, Rey reached up with both hands, cupping Ben’s face and turning it slightly so that she could look into his eyes. “Ben, I’m here… please…”

_ The flames were closer, and Ben could just make out a bloody hand, lying on the ground… _

_ “Ben? Ben… listen to me…” A sweet, comforting voice came to him through the flames, and Ben found himself able to breathe just a little bit better even with the flames reaching for him. “Ben… it’s me, Rey… come back to me, Ben. Wherever you are, come back to me…” _

_ Something soft and warm was cupping his face, and the flames retreated for some reason, the smoke lessening even more. Ben gulped in a deep breath of fresh air, leaning into the softness as he felt the adrenaline start to subside. “Ben, I’m here… please…” _

Suddenly he was back in reality, Rey’s hazel eyes staring into his as her hands cupped his face. He was in a tiny space, his arms wrapped around his knees, and as Ben realized just where he was, he leaned forward, whispering a quiet “Thank you” as his eyes locked onto her lips. He moved closer, his lips almost meeting hers before she pulled her hands away, leaning back, her eyes sad as she looked at him.

“Ben… I… we can’t. You’re my client. I-I’m sorry.”

“Yeah… I- sorry.” Ben managed to crawl out from under the desk finally before settling himself back into the chair, looking everywhere but at Rey. “I… can we… I’d like to go now, please.”

Rey let out a sigh before nodding. “Sure, Ben. See you on Wednesday?”

Ben shrugged before standing and going to the door, looking over his shoulder and finally muttering, “See you on Wednesday.”

At least he had spending time with Kylo to look forward too, since he had now officially fucked up things with Rey.

….

Ben and Kylo’s bond grew, even when things grew awkward with Rey. Ben knew he had fucked things up, and so he tried his best to remain neutral when they were together, acting as if she was nothing more than his therapist - which was what she wanted. Ben tried to keep himself from thinking about her outside of therapy, but she was even more present in his life now then she had been. They had lunch together to see how Kylo and Ben would work together in a crowded restaurant. They went grocery shopping one night, again to see how Kylo would be able to help Ben in a public, highly stressful situation. 

He and Kylo were a good team. Kylo seemed to sense when Ben was getting anxious or angry, and he would raise his dark snout up, giving Ben a lick to his hand to remind him he wasn’t alone anymore. Just having Kylo by his side made things easier for him. While the headaches still plagued him almost daily, and nightmares woke him up in the middle of the night, sweating and shaking, Ben knew Kylo would help make things more bearable for him.

Rey, though… that was still all muddled up. He wished he had never had a breakdown in her office that day. He wished he was smoother, wished he was less fucked up. It was no wonder she hadn’t wanted to kiss him, and had used the easy excuse of being his therapist.

He would be alright, even though he was utterly crazy about her. In another month, he would be done with this program, and he and Kylo would go about a somewhat normal life together - as normal as his life could be, anyways. He would always be fucked up, but at least he would have a better way to deal with it now. His feelings for Rey, though… Ben didn’t know if those would ever go away.

Rey tried to put a smile on her face as she got out of her car, going around to the back to let Kylo out. The canine sat at her feet while she attached a leash to his collar, and Rey bent down to scratch his chest. “What am I going to do, buddy? I am so in love with your new Daddy, but I can’t sabotage his treatment. I can’t stop thinking about him, though. He’s pretty handsome, isn’t he? Kinda like you! Come, let’s go see Daddy!”

Rey planted a kiss to Kylo’s head, and he tilted his head to one side, watching her as she stood. When she gave the command, he stood as well, following along beside her as they navigated the path leading to the dog park where they would be meeting Ben for a playdate. Kylo needed to have good socialization skills with other dogs, as well, and this was a part of that plan.

If she got to spend time with Ben - well, that was just a perk of the job. Rey couldn’t deny that her feelings ran far beyond what a therapist should feel for a patient. She thought about Ben almost every moment of the day, hoping he was alright. She felt horrible for not letting him kiss her - but she had to stay professional and set proper boundaries. She could see the sadness in Ben’s eyes every time he looked at her, and she wanted nothing more than to tell him everything - that she thought about him all the time, and that she had wanted to kiss him that day in her office.

It was the hardest thing she had ever done, maintaining professional boundaries with him, when all she wanted to do was spend time with him.

Kylo’s tail started to wag feverishly, and Rey waved at Ben, who was standing next to the entrance of the dog park waiting for them. He gave a slight nod back, and Rey felt her heart start beating crazily in her chest, fluttering like a butterfly was trapped deep within her. He had been so cold, almost, since their near kiss, and Rey knew he was protecting himself from being hurt.

She had never wanted to hurt him. She wanted to help him. And now… now she wanted him to kiss her senseless. Even though it couldn’t happen yet. 

Ben watched as Rey approached, trying not to go to her, even though everything in him wanted to be in her orbit, even for a few brief moments. He focused on Kylo instead, crouching as the dog approached him with a tail that was wagging so fast it seemed as if he could take flight.

“Buddy!” Ben called out, putting one hand out to pet the dog as he approached. Kylo sniffed Ben’s face before proceeding to lick him thoroughly, causing a laugh to leave his lips at seeing how excited Kylo was to see him. “I know, I know… I missed you, too, buddy,” Ben said, finally standing and looking at Rey. He tried to keep his expression neutral. “Hi, Rey.”

She looked beautiful, standing before him like she was. If he had known better, he would have thought he saw love shining in her eyes - but that was just a pipe dream. She was his therapist - nothing more, nothing less.

Clearing his throat, Ben said, “I’m going to take him into the park, if that’s okay?” Rey nodded and handed Ben Kylo’s leash, and the pair made their way inside the fenced-in dog park. 

Rey gave Ben his space as much as she could, choosing to watch man and beast from a park bench outside the fence. It was clear the pair had bonded, and Rey could already see the difference in Ben when he was near Kylo. They were so close to the end of their training, and Rey was happy for them both. Once she had dropped off Kylo at Ben’s home, the training would be over, and she wouldn’t see either of them again - which made her incredibly sad. How could she function knowing she couldn’t see Ben again. Rey realized she had tears in her eyes, reaching up to swipe them away as Ben and Kylo made their appearance before her. Kylo immediately realized she was in some distress, sitting beside her and letting out a small whine to get her attention. Reaching down, Rey stroked his fur, giving him a smile. “It’s okay, handsome. I’m okay…”

Kylo seemed to know she was lying as he scooted closer, licking her hand and letting out a whine again.

Ben settled onto the bench beside her, looking at Kylo for a moment before remarking, “You’re upset. He knows.”

“Yeah,” Rey said quietly, sniffling once and swiping her hand over her eyes. Being this close to Ben had her heart in her throat, and she was finding words difficult as she resisted the urge to lean into his warm shoulder for comfort. “It’s okay, buddy,” Rey finally said, leaning down so that Kylo could lick her face. Finally satisfied that she was alright, the large dog lie down in front of Ben’s feet, deciding that a nap was in his best interest.

“Are you alright?” Ben asked after a few minutes of silence, in which he worked his jaw furiously as he thought about what he should say or do in the current situation.

“Yes. No… I… this is so hard.” Rey said, staring out across the park, her face red as she tried her best to remain calm.

“What is?” Ben asked curiously, watching her as she fought to keep her emotions off her face.

Rey sighed, trying to formulate her scattered thoughts into words. It was strange, being the one needing emotional support, when usually that was her role to people. Finally, Rey bit her bottom lip gently before saying, “Have you ever wanted something so badly that you thought you might throw everything away for it? Just so you could be happy, even if it cost you?”

“Yes,” Ben’s eyes bored into hers, glittering with unshed tears. “There is something I want like that. I would give anything to have h- _ it _ .” Ben drew in a deep breath, hoping he wasn’t reading the look in her eyes wrong. “I…” Ben gulped before continuing, “I found something precious, and I want to cherish it for the rest of my life… but it would cause so many issues, and it’s killing me that I can’t have it.”

“Ben…” Rey whispered softly, “I feel it, too.”

Ben reached out, gulping again before touching her face with his hand, leaning in towards her, and, when their lips met, he knew he had come home. Rey and Kylo were his home, and he felt  _ right _ again when she was touching him. It was overwhelming and all encompassing… and Ben never wanted it to change.

Rey’s head was swimming as her lips met Ben’s, and as his hand went to the back of her neck, pulling her in closer as he deepened their kiss, Rey let out a little moan, her hand pressing onto his chest. It was the best kiss she had ever had in her life, and she wanted more. She wanted more of Ben, wanted to kiss him and touch him and…

And this couldn’t happen. She was his therapist, and professional boundaries had to be in place - at least until he was out of her care in another month.

She pushed with her hand, his lips leaving her feeling cold and longing for his warmth immediately.

“Rey…” Ben said quietly, “I’m in love with you.”

“I know…” Rey said in response. “But… we can’t.”

“Oh… yeah. Um, okay. Sorry. Sorry for… you know. I guess I was reading into it wrong. No, um, no big deal. We can forget it ever happened.” Ben’s face colored as he stumbled over his words, his heart fracturing inside his chest. Without thinking, he reached down, running his hand over Kylo’s soft fur. The dog lifted his head, letting out a low whine at Ben’s distress. 

_ You’re a dumbass, Solo. Why would she want you, after all? _

“No… Ben…” Rey could sense his rising panic, and Kylo’s reaction solidified it for her. Ben thought she didn’t want him - when she did. “Listen,” Rey said, reaching out and placing her hand on his. “We want the same things, Ben. I… I’ve wanted you for a while now, since before that day in my office. We just… we have to wait for a little longer, okay? I need to keep a professional boundary with my clients… but Ben, you are so much more than a client to me. Please… be patient?”

“I… you feel the same?” Ben’s head was swimming as he looked into Rey’s eyes, still not believing she had the same feelings he did. He had to be patient, had to play by her rules. He could do that, if he got to be with her in the end.

Rey nodded, and Ben smiled. “I can be patient.”

“Good. Because I really want this to work in the end,” Rey said, giving Ben a bright smile.

“Me too, Rey. Me too.”

….

It was hard, loving someone from a distance. Ben spent most of his free time going to meetings and working out. Those few precious hours every week he spent with Rey and Kylo were never enough. Still, Ben knew that it would be worth it. Knowing he could pursue a relationship with her once they were no longer therapist and patient helped.

He was trying to be a better man for her. He wanted to be a better man for her, and Kylo.

Ben paced the length of his apartment, running a hand through his hair nervously. He checked to make sure he had everything in order - from the dog bed resting in the corner of the living room, to the food and water bowls next to the island in the kitchen. He had purchased enough toys for two dogs, and a half a shelf in his pantry was for Kylo’s dog treats. His new leash and harness hung on a hanger by the front door - and Ben hoped he had everything in order. If he did, then Kylo would be staying with him after Rey left tonight - becoming his best friend and helper permanently.

His buzzer rang, and Ben looked at the screen to see Rey and Kylo waiting at the door of his building, and he buzzed them in. He paced for a few moments more, until he heard the soft knock on his door. Opening it to see Rey and Kylo, Ben smiled at her before crouching to rub Kylo’s head between the ears. “Hey buddy,” he said, his smile growing wider as Kylo gave him a lick to his face.

Ben stood, opening the door wider. “Come in,” he said, watching as Rey stepped into his home. It felt so natural, for her to be in his space. Kylo explored, sticking his dark snout into everything, finally curling up on the bed Ben had bought for him, promptly falling asleep. Rey had wandered from room to room as well, checking things off on the paperwork she had brought with her.

Finally, Ben couldn’t handle it anymore, and he asked, “Well? Does everything check out alright?”

Rey looked up from the clipboard she had taken out of her bag, nodding. “Oh yeah. Kylo will be staying here tonight for sure. He’s yours.” Rey grinned at Ben.

Ben nodded, watching as Rey stepped closer to the door. When she reached it, turning to say goodbye, Ben was there, caging her in with his arms as he leaned close to her. “So… since Kylo has been approved officially to be mine… does that mean you are no longer my therapist?” He leaned in even more now, skimming his lips over the shell of Rey’s ear. 

She shivered, her brain and heart both stuttering before she answered quietly, “Yes. Technically, I am no longer your therapist.”

“Good,” Ben answered before capturing her lips with his. “Stay here with me tonight, Rey.”

And she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments and kudos, and mash that subscribe button if you like what you see! <3
> 
> Come visit me on tumblr:[my-jedi-life](https://my-jedi-life.tumblr.com/)
> 
> And on the twitter: [MyJediLife](https://twitter.com/MyJediLife)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wedding!

[ ](https://imgur.com/lcZBHbG)

Loving Ben Solo was the easiest thing she had ever done. Rey slid her hand down her waist, marveling at the softness of the dress she was wearing. It was the nicest thing she had ever worn, and while she felt out of her comfort zone - she also felt beautiful.

She only hoped Ben felt the same.

Rey felt like the last year and a half of her life had been a whirlwind. Since she and Ben had started dating, things had been better than ever for both of them. Ben had decided to join her in her dog training business, quickly gaining the certification he needed to start training dogs for other military members, and then branching out and using his military training to train dogs for both the police and military.

He had fought through the darkness and found his path, the path he was meant to walk, and Rey had watched his confidence grow each and every day. He still had trouble with his short term memory, and still had headaches and nightmares - but having Kylo and her with him helped.

Rey turned as the door opened and her best friend Rose peeked her head in. “You ready to do this?”

Rey barked out a laugh. “Yes… and no.”

Rose smirked at her. “You look beautiful. I’ll tell Han you’re ready.”

Rey nodded, calling out to her friend as she started to close the door. “Rose?”

“Yeah?” Rose’s dark head came back around the corner, her eyes meeting Rey’s. 

“Ben? He… he’s here, right? Is he handling everything alright?” Rey had been concerned all morning, wondering how Ben was handling the preparations. If it was nerve-wracking for her, it had to be doubly so for him.

Rose laughed, a delightful tinkle that danced through the air. “Yes, Ben is here. He looks very dapper in his tux, and he is doing fine. He had a few bad moments, but Kylo helped. That man is so in love with you, Rey. You’re lucky.”

“I am. I really am,” Rey said as she smiled and nodded. “Send Han back, please.”

….

Ben Solo was a lucky man. He had been given several new shots at life. The second shot happened in the desert of Iraq, when he had somehow survived a roadside bomb. The third shot had been the day he had walked into the office of Rey Kanata, and promptly lost his heart.

Nothing had been the same since, and nothing would ever be the same again.

Here he was, a year and a half later, marrying the love of his life. Ben reached down, tugging at the bottom of his tux jacket. Kylo whined slightly from his spot beside Ben, and Ben smiled and reached down, rolling his eyes at the ridiculous collar of flowers that his mother and Rose had insisted he wear.

“I know, buddy. I know. I’ll stay calm.”

Ben settled himself into a chair, waiting for the cue to go to his spot to wait for Rey. Looking out the window, Ben sighed and closed his eyes, trying to center himself. He was supposed to enjoy today, to celebrate his love for Rey.

He did that every day though. He had become a better man, had beaten back all his demons for her - and for himself as well. Ben liked the man he was now. He was comfortable once more in his own skin. He had taken all the skills he had learned in the military, and figured out how to put them to work in a way that would benefit others.

He was proud of who he had become.

The last time he recalled feeling this nervous, though, was the day he had proposed to Rey.

….

_ “What do you think, buddy?” Ben looked at Kylo, and his best friend simply panted at him in response, his pink tongue hanging out of one side of his mouth. _

_ “Thanks for your vote of confidence…” Ben replied, shaking his head slightly. “You know you have a big job tonight, right? Don’t screw it up…” Ben grinned at Kylo, patting him on the head softly. _

_ “Do you trust me?” Ben murmured later that night, as he picked Rey up at her apartment.  _

_ She smiled at him and nodded without hesitation. “With my life.” _

_ “Good, then put this on.” Ben produced a blindfold, smiling at her. Rey simply raised a brow at him before her smile widened. _

_ “Kinky. I like it.” _

_ “Hush. Be a good girl here.” Ben tied the blindfold around her head, plunging her world into darkness and trying to ignore as she let out a little purr before remarking. _

_ “I will be a very good girl for you.” _

_ Shaking his head and chuckling, Ben guided her to his car. Once he had her inside, he quickly drove them to their destination, and once they were in the right spot, Ben removed her blindfold to reveal a romantic picnic dinner laid out, complete with candles and a centerpiece of delicate pink roses. _

_ As Rey’s hand flew up to her mouth in shock, Ben said quietly, “Six months ago, in this spot, my life changed for the better. We kissed and admitted we were in love with each other, and even though we had to wait a month to start dating, I knew then that I was going to be a better man for you - because you deserve it.” _

_ Tears started pooling in Rey’s eyes, and Ben helped her to sit down, serving them both food from the basket. They talked, reminiscing about their time together, and, when the sun was starting to dip beyond the horizon, Ben put two fingers in his mouth, whistling loudly. As Kylo made his appearance, Ben sank to his knees in front of Rey, looking up at her with love and devotion shining in his eyes. _

_ “I can’t imagine ever wanting to be with anyone else, Rey. You have given me life again when I thought I was so broken no one would ever want me. You made me want to be a better man, and I want to share everything with you. Forever. Would you marry me?” _

_ Rey nodded, tears slipping down her cheeks, and as Ben untied the ring he had tied around Kylo’s collar earlier that day and slipped it on her finger, it felt like he was coming home once more. _

….

The music swelled from the violins, and everyone stood as Rey made her way onto the path that would lead her to Ben, her arm looped through Han’s. After a short, agonizingly slow walk, Rey saw him. Ben. Her future. Her  _ everything.  _ Kylo was at his side, sitting quietly in his double duty as best man and ring bearer, and his tail thumped against the ground when he saw Rey, his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth.

Ben’s eyes met hers, and she saw unshed tears in their depths as he mouthed, “I love you” to her. She mouthed it back, and Han chuckled beside her.

“You two are meant for one another.” He said quietly, and Rey swallowed around the lump in her throat as she answered simply, “We are.”

As they twined fingers and turned towards their officiant to listen as he bound them together as husband and wife, Rey and Ben only saw each other, the world fading away until only they existed. Their happy bubble was burst for a few moments as they said their vows and slid the rings on each other’s fingers, both of them reaching down to pat Kylo on the head as he fulfilled his duty as ring bearer.

The rest of the night was spent with their guests, and as Ben spun her around the dance floor, Rey had never felt happier. She had often heard the saying that some people found their true home in the arms of another person, and Rey had never quite understood it.

She understood now. Her home was in Ben’s arms, and her place was at his side - no matter where they went or what they were doing. They had found each other, and together they were going to thrive in this life, their permanent home being at each other’s side for the rest of their lives.

Ben looked down at her, the corners of his eyes crinkling up as he smiled. “I love you, Mrs. Solo. You’re everything to me.”

Rey gave Ben a bright smile of her own before standing on tiptoe to kiss him. “And you, Mr. Solo, are my home. Forever.”

“Forever,” Ben agreed, kissing her once more.

Sometimes, home isn’t a place, but a person. And sometimes, you’re lucky enough to find that person that makes you want to be a better person for them.

And that person becomes your home.

Forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments and kudos, and mash that subscribe button if you like what you see! <3
> 
> Come visit me on tumblr:[my-jedi-life](https://my-jedi-life.tumblr.com/)
> 
> And on the twitter: [MyJediLife](https://twitter.com/MyJediLife)

**Author's Note:**

> Leave comments and kudos, and mash that subscribe button if you like what you see! <3
> 
> Come visit me on tumblr:[my-jedi-life](https://my-jedi-life.tumblr.com/)
> 
> And on the twitter: [MyJediLife](https://twitter.com/MyJediLife)


End file.
